Ever hear the one about a man who walks into a bike shop and gives the mechanics some bike lube made out of plastic?
I didn’t think so. Nor did I.
There is quite a battle out there involving bicycle lubes. This one is organic, another one is au natural, and this one plant based. Many of the best lubricants are made out of dead dinosaurs mixed with Teflon®. Then you have your synthetic oils.
So the man that walked into the bike shop was touting the benefits of the lubricants made by Dumonde Tech. These folks make all kinds of lubricants starting with motorsports and ending with bicycle greases and chain lube. Their forte is chain lubes that uses polymers ( plastic ) that adhere to your chain, are waterproof and will attract members of the opposite sex to you, but only if you apply it properly. You end up using only a tiny bit of product compared to what you would normally pour all over your chain with other lubricants. Not only will you look faster, but you will use less watts of energy to move your bicycle forward.
As the man was telling us all of this, my brain was saying, “These bicycle potions sound too good to be true. I’ve got to have some to try for myself.” When he left the shop I followed him out to his car and begged him to give me my own Ziploc® bag full of plastic fantastic, polymer magic to test.
Wednesday, my new Surly fat bike was waiting for me in the car when I left work. She could smell the Dumonde Tech polymer lubricants through the Ziploc® bag that the man had given me. All the way home she insisted that if I didn’t put some on her chain, she would stuff me into a tree the next time I took her for a ride.
Unless you want to become a Dumonde Techno Weenie, stop reading now. Dumonde Tech Bicycle Chain Lube works really well. Enough said for normal people. You have been warned!
I carefully removed the Sil-Tec coated Shimano CN-HG X11 chain from Ms. Wednesday’s new 11speed , XT m8000 drivetrain. Sil-Tec is Shimano’s new wonder coating where they plate some of the chain’s or most of the chain’s parts with fluorine bits to give it better wear, mud shedding, longer life and smoother action than zinc plated chains.
Wednesday’s chain maybe had 100 miles of riding on it before I plunked it Into the bike shop’s industrial parts washer. The chain was cleaned no less than three times, and rinsed with fresh water to get the high PH cleaning fluid out of it’s inner regions. Next it was lovingly dried, dry with an air hose and hung up on a hook. The next day….. three, count them three applications of the original formula Dumonde Tech Bicycle Chain Lube ( BCL ) was applied one drop at a time to each of the 116 links of the chain. It was allowed time to soak into the nether regions of the chain. Then the outside of the chain was meticulously wiped off and then Wednesday was ridden around the parking lot, in an effort to coax the polymers to unite with Wednesday’s chain. The riding was done after each application. The Dumonde Tech rep told me that my little rides around the parking lot were not enough to really get the Dumonde Tech chain lube to adhere to the CN-HG X11’s chain’s inner regions. I needed a longer ride for the polymerization to occur. When you pedal, the heat and pressure created by your fabulous thighs permanently adhere the polymers to the chain. At this point Dumonde Tech BCL creates a low friction plating that won’t wash off or attract dirt.
Wednesday took me on a tour around Purgatory Park and then back home to get her Dumonde Tech BCL installed properly.
We have since ridden on dirty crushed limestone trails, that leave a Comet cleanser like dust on everything and sticks to regular dry lubes and wears out chains in short order. Wednesday and I rode some on the roads less traveled, and a bit of real off road riding. Let’s say 250 miles of use give or take a few. The chain is as quiet as a church mouse and has not shown any signs of wear yet. The shifting is excellent too.
The man who walked into the bike shop also told us a few things about the original ( Standard ) flavor of Dumonde Tech BCL. Firstly, it comes in two concentrations. Secondly he told us that the accelerant ( carrier ) of both products smells like blue cheese. ( Now I know how Wednesday knew I had a new chain lube in that Ziploc® bag.) She and I both like blue cheese, so I did not think this would be a problem, but a plus. Well, to my nose the original formula Dumonde Tech BCL doesn’t smell like blue cheese. It smells more like the bathroom door of a tuna boat than any cheese I have enjoyed. WOW, don’t apply this stuff on your chain in a closed space or anywhere, that your spouse or significant other can come across it before it dries, and becomes odorless.
Dumonde Tech suggests you use their Original flavor BCL for dirty, icky conditions like cyclocross and mountain biking in the wet or dry. Their calorie conscious Lite BCL formula is the same as the Original except it is less concentrated and Dumonde Tech likes it for Road riding. They also suggest you can use either formula interchangeably. They even say cables, and pivots on your derailleur like it when polymers cling to them. You can do your initial chain lubing with the Original and then use the Lite version for subsequent applications. As we heard earlier they are interchangeable. You only need to reapply Dumonde Tech BCL when your chain becomes audible.
Dumonde Tech also offer in their “Standard” Bicycle Lubricant line some other lubricants your bicycle will enjoy. IE: MR Grease ( Micro Resistance Polymer ) , for all your greasing needs, except, Freehub Grease especially for, you guessed it, freehubs. Also a Freehub Oil for a lighter touch on your pawls that is good to -40 degrees F, this is a boon for us winter riders. They also have a 100% bio-degradable BCL that is plant based and perfect for vegan inclined bicycles. The Dumonde Tech Bio Green Citrus Solvent is recommended for initial chain cleaning and removal of almost anything else.
It doesn’t hurt plastic! Unwanted wax from the base of your of your skis or snowboard, gone! Unseemly labels or bumper stickers from the last election tremble and drop to the ground at the sight of this product. Tubular tires are said to leap off of their rims when Dumonde Tech Bio Green Citrus Solvent is applied. All of this is wonderful but I have saved the best for last, because it is my favorite: Dumonde Tech Liquid Grease. Wheel bearings love this stuff. Once a bit covers your steel or ceramic balls and heat is applied by running them in, you have the slickest un-gooey hubs around. Freewheels move and groove like never before ( You can also use the Freehub oil if it is cold out.) Use it anywhere you used to use Tenacious Oil.
Now to make it more confusing, Dumonde Tech have another offering of bicycle lubes. It is their Pro X line. In fact they offer most all of the Dumonde Tech “ Standard” lubes in the Pro X line. The Pro X formulas contain carriers that are VOC ( volatile organic compound ) exempt, and can be shipped to other countries and by air, because they don’t stink like their “Standard” brethren. All the rest of the polymer stuff is the same.
I just cleaned and lubed a buddies chain with Original flavor Dumonde Tech BCL. He is going to do some 350 mile Great Divide ride. I also gave him a bottle of the Dumonde Tech Lite BCL to take with him on his bike packing adventure.
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